People who know me from my younger days ( feels funny to use younger day... But yes , I just turned 40 !!) know that I always was an alien to the sports world. There are some who play , some who follow sports; who relish the adrenaline rush; But I could never get myself to even understand why would anyone want to watch others play. Playing makes sense but not playing and just watching; what fun is that?
For me, I always felt I was wired differently w.r.t sports. My brain is just not meant to play or watch any kind of sports!
When I got married, I knew the person right to the core. ( or did I :)) Every day of my new life got me closer to my dreaded alien world of sports. My husband's very existence is all about sports ! Over the years I let myself take a free fall into this new world. My kids got totally hooked on to tennis. They started playing competitively at young age. My journey along with them empowered me with the ability to focus, understand and enjoy sports.
Junior tennis is one of the hottest trend in current generation. Parents who are closely associated with it will agree it wasn't so "crazy" few years back- Just for reference ,This is year 2017.
I have dedicated may be around 8 years understanding physical, mental and financial complexities of junior tennis. Physical and Financial aspects can be dealt with humanely. The most important aspect I totally fail to understand from a junior point of view is the mental aspect.
Mental toughness, staying calm, being focused, staying positive ; all the qualities that majority of the adults fail to accomplish are expected effortlessly from a 10 or 12 year old or a teenager.
Fair line calls, maintaining fair scores , being fair , being respectful ! Yes, Ideally they sound just perfect. But that is perfect in an ideal world.
The age demands a behavior where every kid can do anything and everything to win. That is what being a kid is all about.
There have been tons of studies on brain development. There is research on teenage brain.
Case 3 - Unfair line call and screaming opponent.
This is case 2 added with invasion of your emotional boundaries. This would probably result in much more than flight or fight reaction since we are talking about teenagers not adults.
Case 4 - Unfair line calls , screaming opponent with no interference from authority
Lets keep this short - This is a cocktail of disaster.
If we take percentages; case 1 candidates are probably 20% . Remaining 80% comprise of case 2,3, and 4.
I cannot help but fathom how kids deal with that kind of pressure when anatomically they are not there yet.
Many adult brains capable of executing this kind of composed behavior fail to comply to these standard expectations. How can a teenager accomplish the same when disaster strikes. Is it the kid to be blamed or the fully grown adult authority who are in charge of the whole process?
Why would a kid not make unfavorable line calls if it means to win a match? Why wouldnt a kid stop screaming in the pretext of pumping themselves if they know its affecting the opponents mental stability?
From a kid perspective, from an underdeveloped brain perspective, isn't winning at any cost justified?
How appallingly difficult would it be for a "rule follower-Honest" kid to survive the ordeal and still grow to play the sports as an adult?
Yes its complex, and yes I still fail to understand when parents on the side line ask kids to stay calm when their opponent has made 5 bad calls on critical points taking 4 games in a row. I cannot imagine being on the court playing such an opponent and knowing that the authority who can control the situation refuses to do so ! I do not know how I would behave or react. It is not about tennis then; It is about survival instinct.
We as adults fail those kids by not providing enough referees to give them a chance to have a fair game and by not doing that we acknowledge and promote kids to do whatever it takes to win but in a wrong way.
For me, I always felt I was wired differently w.r.t sports. My brain is just not meant to play or watch any kind of sports!
When I got married, I knew the person right to the core. ( or did I :)) Every day of my new life got me closer to my dreaded alien world of sports. My husband's very existence is all about sports ! Over the years I let myself take a free fall into this new world. My kids got totally hooked on to tennis. They started playing competitively at young age. My journey along with them empowered me with the ability to focus, understand and enjoy sports.
Junior tennis is one of the hottest trend in current generation. Parents who are closely associated with it will agree it wasn't so "crazy" few years back- Just for reference ,This is year 2017.
I have dedicated may be around 8 years understanding physical, mental and financial complexities of junior tennis. Physical and Financial aspects can be dealt with humanely. The most important aspect I totally fail to understand from a junior point of view is the mental aspect.
Mental toughness, staying calm, being focused, staying positive ; all the qualities that majority of the adults fail to accomplish are expected effortlessly from a 10 or 12 year old or a teenager.
Fair line calls, maintaining fair scores , being fair , being respectful ! Yes, Ideally they sound just perfect. But that is perfect in an ideal world.
The age demands a behavior where every kid can do anything and everything to win. That is what being a kid is all about.
There have been tons of studies on brain development. There is research on teenage brain.
It doesn’t matter how smart teens are academically or how good they are in sports . Good
judgment isn’t something they can excel in, at least not yet.
Adult and teen brains work differently. Adults
think with the prefrontal cortex, the brain’s rational part. This is the part of the
brain that responds to situations with good judgment and an awareness of long-term
consequences. Teens process information with the amygdala. This is the emotional part.
In teen’s brains, the connections between the emotional part of the brain and the
decision-making center are still developing—and not necessarily at the same rate.
That’s why when teens experience overwhelming emotional input, they can’t explain
later what they were thinking. They weren’t thinking as much as they were feeling.
Now consider the same kid playing a competitive match.
Case 1- Opponent is fair, its a clean match with no issues.
Such opponents are a blessing and facilitate an ideal growth environment. A lot can be learnt on court but controlling emotions and staying calm takes the precedence so that brain can think rationally to encourage playing points effectively to win. This would be a near perfect scenario that almost everyone hopes for.
Case 2 - Unfair line call yet calm opponent
Unfairness for sure triggers anger and frustration thereby giving out undesirable match outcomes.Case 3 - Unfair line call and screaming opponent.
This is case 2 added with invasion of your emotional boundaries. This would probably result in much more than flight or fight reaction since we are talking about teenagers not adults.
Case 4 - Unfair line calls , screaming opponent with no interference from authority
Lets keep this short - This is a cocktail of disaster.
If we take percentages; case 1 candidates are probably 20% . Remaining 80% comprise of case 2,3, and 4.
I cannot help but fathom how kids deal with that kind of pressure when anatomically they are not there yet.
Many adult brains capable of executing this kind of composed behavior fail to comply to these standard expectations. How can a teenager accomplish the same when disaster strikes. Is it the kid to be blamed or the fully grown adult authority who are in charge of the whole process?
Why would a kid not make unfavorable line calls if it means to win a match? Why wouldnt a kid stop screaming in the pretext of pumping themselves if they know its affecting the opponents mental stability?
From a kid perspective, from an underdeveloped brain perspective, isn't winning at any cost justified?
How appallingly difficult would it be for a "rule follower-Honest" kid to survive the ordeal and still grow to play the sports as an adult?
Yes its complex, and yes I still fail to understand when parents on the side line ask kids to stay calm when their opponent has made 5 bad calls on critical points taking 4 games in a row. I cannot imagine being on the court playing such an opponent and knowing that the authority who can control the situation refuses to do so ! I do not know how I would behave or react. It is not about tennis then; It is about survival instinct.
We as adults fail those kids by not providing enough referees to give them a chance to have a fair game and by not doing that we acknowledge and promote kids to do whatever it takes to win but in a wrong way.
